Robot and Son

We’ve been enjoying reading “The Wild Robot” by Peter Brown on the subway to summer camp. A robot named Roz who is shipwrecked on an island populated by animals becomes the mother of a gosling. 

In my son’s action movie universe, the second act of the story would probably involve the revelation that Roz the maternal robot was actually a high tech killing machine from a future timeline, and she would have to use her previously hidden weaponry to save the island’s residents from an interdimensional menace. Many explosions would ensue. 

We haven’t finished the book yet, but I am pretty sure that is not what is going to happen. 

After looking at this napkin, my son told me that he envisioned Roz as looking more like Futurama’s Bender than the Terminator.

Bender would have been easier to draw.

DeadPooh and Cable Too

Consider yourself pounced.

Having sat through the “Christopher Robin” movie preview a couple of times now, listening to Ewan McGregor say, “POOH!” repeatedly....well, it seemed like we had to have a DeadPooh.

I was thinking about pairing him with Spider-Tigger-Man, or maybe Wolverine/Tigger, (too much claw similarity) but our younger son thought Cable was a better bet. 

Perhaps I was just trying to avoid the additional labor of figuring out what Cable was wearing in Deadpool 2 and exactly what his arm looked like.

As it was, I neglected to draw the stuffed bear on his belt...but perhaps that would have been redundant...or meta?

Deadpool Goes Full Winnie The Pooh

Deadpool Goes Full Winnie the Pooh

Amid the avalanche of pop culture references in Deadpool 2, there is a memorable one to the honey loving denizen of the hundred acre wood.

The reference comes up after Deadpool has been torn in half and is home regrowing his lower body as a pair of toddler legs with adjacent little kid anatomy.  Like the name checked bear, Wade is only wearing a shirt.  And there is also a “Basic Instinct” reference. I’ll leave it there.

Yes, so very inappropriate for family viewing.  That was the point of course.

But I find the display of male body parts in a mainstream movie in a non sexual (and non violent) context to be not entirely a bad thing. 

I realize this may not be a popular sentiment. There is a thicket of gender issues here that I will resist wading into today. But suffice it to say, while the Deadpool film franchise certainly prides itself on boundary pushing, it troubles me less than most R rated action movies as it is not so steeped in misogynistic imagery.

For the napkin, of course the pants had to be on, so the Pooh reference had to be shifted a bit....but the DeadPooh possibilities are there... My kids were not big Winnie the Pooh fans back in the day. (They preferred Curious George)

But, like most small children, they did enjoy reclining on the couch without pants. 

Bros in Bowls

(They hate it when you tap on the glass)

Recently, the Leviathan skin in Fortnite was of great interest to our older son, (that’s Levianthan on the left) But unfortunately, he did not have the funds to purchase the fish head for gameplay.

Leviathan was purportedly inspired by Minion from the 2011 DreamWorks movie Megamind. (That’s the one with the gorilla suit on the right)

But Leviathan also reminded us of Fish from “Fish N Chips” a comic by Steve Hamaker, unsurprisingly, the one in the middle.

And there was also Fish, a character from “Chicken Little” a rather misguided effort from Disney back in 2005. Our older son was absolutely fixated on “Chicken Little” around age three, and in a Stockholm Syndrome sort of situation, after endless viewing, I learned to love it also. And it has Fish, who is based on the children’s book “Fish Out of Water” (also obsessed over here at our house many years ago). Fish wears a sort of reverse diving helmet/bowl on his head. His pal and classmate, Chicken Little reminds their friends: “They hate it when you tap on the glass” (I may still have all of the movie’s dialogue memorized)

But, sad to say, that Fish did not have a cool robot body, so he is excluded here, despite being the likely source of our affection for fishy persons wearing helmet bowls.

Uncle Feather from Judy Blume's "Superfudge"

The Mynah Bird from "Superfudge" shows how cosmopolitan he is.

Our younger son is supposed to read 2-6 chapter books out loud to an adult over the summer. 

We've been working our way through Judy Blume's "Superfudge" the sequel to "Tales of  a Fourth Grade Nothing"  reading on the subway train every morning on the way to camp.

Both books have quite a bit about pets, which as I may have mentioned, is a contentious topic around here.

In "Superfudge," the annoying younger brother, who previously distinguished himself by eating his older brother's pet turtle, gets a pet of his own, a talking Mynah bird. Uncle Feather has a sarcastic flair for word repetition and says hello in French. 

Sadly, Mynah birds are very hard to come by these days. I don't think they reproduce well in captivity. 

I'm not sure that a talking bird would fill the puppy shaped hole at our house anyway. 

Even if it spoke French.

Bears at Home on the Couch

Sometimes the bear is your bro:

My younger son really enjoyed Shannon Hale's "Real Friends," illustrated by LeUyen Pham.

"Real Friends" is the semi autobiographical story of a middle schooler's fraught relationships with her friends at school and her volatile older sister who is sometimes portrayed as a giant bear. 

Which brings us to the question of which sibling is the Grizzly at our house?

My vote is: 

Both. 

Obviously.

Gwenforte from Adam Gidwitz's "The Inquisitor's Tale"

We've just finished reading  The Inquisitors Tale: Or Three Magical Children and Their Holy Dog" during our commute to school. Adam Gidwitz's illuminated "Canterbury Tales" like story of three kids and a possibly ressurected greyhound who narrowly escape martyrdom in medieval France is a nice counterpoint for morning rush hour on the New York City subway.

It is a little passive aggressive to read out loud to your kid in a packed subway car. People who are reading their own books have huffily moved away from us on more than one occasion. But in the mornings, really, no one has anywhere to go if they don't appreciate my interpretation of the text. Most people are pretty tolerant, or at least do their best to ignore me. Or are wearing earbuds anyway.

A Monster Calls in the Classroom

I picked up a copy of "A Monster Calls" by Patrick Ness and Siobhan Dowd to read to my son on the train during our daily commute to school without giving the plot of the book much thought.  It features a monster visiting a young boy, and I was pretty sure that would make for compelling reading on packed subway cars.  I did not pay too much attention to the fact that the the boy's mother is slowly dying from cancer throughout the story.

And I didn't count on my son identifying with the protagonist quite so thoroughly and deeply. As my son's not actively dying mother, I found this a little bit disturbing, although I recognized that it was perhaps unintentionally (on my part anyway) therapeutic, and certainly provided a compelling distraction during trying  subway rides. "A Monster Calls"  is not just about loss so much as overwhelming anger and guilt in the face of loss, and this is perhaps what made it so relevant to my son.  Although my son did helpfully point out to me that my brief and totally non life threatening health issues earlier this year made him feel like he has a lot in common with the kid in the story. Oh dear.

We just discovered that this book that I had initially thought was maybe  a little obscure is a huge bestseller (#1 in "Teen and Young Adult Monster Fiction" on Amazon...did you know that was a category?) and has been made into a movie supposedly opening later this year.

My son is very enthusiastic about seeing the movie.

Having managed to read long weepy maternal death scenes out loud to a subway car full of strangers without overtly crying, I am cautiously optimistic about taking him to see it.

(The kid in the classroom on the napkin is more my son than Conor O'Malley, if that needs to be pointed out)

Election Night Monsters

Mouths and Hair:
Just the important parts.

The kids really enjoyed reading Max Brallier's "The Last Kids on Earth" books recently.

The story follows a group of kids who have survived some sort of apocalyptic event where nearly every human has been turned into a zombie and a wide range of bizarre monsters have suddenly appeared in town.

I don't remember these fanged furballs having a particular name or classification. They were just part of a wide variety within the monster population- and were drawn much more humorously and successfully by the book's illustrator Douglas Holgate.

I know it's a bit of a reach, but somehow these creatures composed only of mouths and hair seemed appropriate to me last night as we watched the 2016 election take a turn for the worse.

Cast of Characters Who Could be in "Goosebumps" Movie

...take one of those abominable group selfies...

My younger son and I finally saw the "Goosebumps" movie over last weekend. His brother was going to a fun birthday party, so he was feeling terribly under-served and required some compensation. As far as I was concerned the movie was pleasant, but not particularly memorable.  My son thought it was great and immediately wanted me to pledge to take him to the sequel, whenever it might be made and released.

While we own several "Goosebumps" books, and I have tried to convince my horror-loving children to read them on many occasions, the series has just not been very popular in the past at our house.  I must confess that I was unaware what a publishing juggernaut the series has been...350 million copies have sold worldwide, and it is the second most popular children's series of all time, according to Wikipedia.

The movie's specific and rather dopey plot aside, "Goosebumps" the movie's charm is that it is a compendium of funny horror characters and therefore transcends the possible failings of each tale of scary zombies, creepy clowns, malicious lawn gnomes, deadly werewolves, etc., etc.

Being an 8 year old, my son was willing to attribute the original creation of many of these sorts of characters to R.L. Stine and the Goosebumps franchise. I reminded him that certainly the idea of werewolves, zombies, the abominable snowmen and ventriloquist dummies among many others predate Scholastic Publishing, some by tens if not hundreds of years.

And, on a more personal note, several of these characters appeared in my recent sculpture show "Popular Monsters," so perhaps I am particularly not willing to cede all credit to Mr. Stine.

Today's napkin is a reunion of sorts of characters who could appear in a best selling children's book series, in a major motion picture, or in my small, unsaleable sculptures.

The Mouse and Motorcycle Thank You Note

Our younger son has been slogging along in a very demanding tutoring program this summer.  He has done some amazing work and deserves much parental applause... But I know that his accomplishments are due to the unflappable and unflagging support of his tutors.

It takes me five minutes of bartering and bickering to get him to read two lines of a TV program synopsis. But with his tutors, he has been happily reading Beverly Cleary's 1965 book "The Mouse and the Motorcycle" and that is considerably more challenging than cable listings.

It is always impossible to sufficiently thank the people who are endlessly patient with my kids.
When confronted with an unsolvable problem, I often resort to drawing on napkins.

I wanted to add my son into this picture, but did not have the time to pull off a portrait. I was really trying to get at least five hours of sleep last night (The New York Times ran an article recently that said that sustained periods of five hours or less a night result in irrevocable hardening of the arteries....so I am already in big trouble)

I still did not attain the artery saving amount of five hours of sleep...but at least I did not annoy my son by drawing a picture of him.

Valiant Cerberus

Valiant the Pug, our kids' favorite character from Giants Beware and Dragons Beware gets the Cerberus treatment.
A three headed dog does appear in the book, along with gargoyles, a witch, and of course, dragons.
Valiant only has the one head in the graphic novels. but he is willing to take on dragons anyway.

Pug and Dragon

Bi-Species Team-up inspired by Dragons Beware:

Our kids were so enthusiastic to receive the sequel to "Giants Beware," by Rafael Rosado and Jorge Aguirre, that we had a bitter struggle over who was going to get to look at the book first. Things were looking so grim that, against my  better judgement, I broke out a second copy that I had purchased for a birthday gift for a friend.

Of course now we have two sticky copies.

Werechipmunk from "Jinx" Series

Kinda cute... but don't mess with his acorns.

As our younger son took all three of the novels in the series to school, it seemed like time for another "Jinx" themed napkin.

Werewolves play an important role in the Urwald, the enchanted forest of the series. There are several references to other "were" animals like werebears and werechipmunks. And the main character, a boy who has a deep, magical connection to the forest, is derisively referred to as "the werechipmunk" by some of his enemies.

I am not sure exactly what these animals look like or how they behave. While they don't morph into people, the werewolves engage in human-like behaviors; two legged locomotion, speech and the deciphering of ancient texts.  Meanwhile, these werewolves are scarier and more dangerous to humans than the average wolf.

Is it the same case for the werechipmunks? Are they dangerous killers? Can they speak?...and maybe sing in pop bands?...We came to the conclusion that perhaps they were small and endearing, but simultaneously rather formidable and dangerous.

My sons are ready to get behind anything that is cute and furry but still deadly.

Bonemaster Skull with Broccoli

Even the evil need nutritious food.

The Bonemaster is the main bad guy in Sage Blackwood's "Jinx" series.  While he seems a fairly reserved and even courteous fellow, we discover that he comes by his name honestly.  He stockpiles the bones of his victims and later proves to be capable of animating the remains in true Ray Harryhausen fashion...And he has done something magic involving his own skeleton.....

But the Bonemaster appears to be the sort of organized fellow who would eat a healthy diet.

My sons are not terribly interested in the concept of healthy eating, but they do eat a lot of broccoli....(maybe just because they like it???)

This is a family secret that I should probably not share on the internet. My sons will resent me for spoiling their coolness and outing them as broccoli eaters, but I don't think this is the sort of revelation that will stand in the way of their future college admissions or employment.

(It has been a while since the last napkin featuring broccoli. You can see the previous broccoli napkins at this link.  There have been quite a few... although not nearly as many as the napkins with strawberries.)

Malthus from "Jinx's Fire"

"You can't have a school without werewolves...
Werewolves can be very helpful in dealing with problem students."
         ---Malthus, werewolf

We've been finishing the third book in Sage Blackwood's "Jinx" series.  The basic story is  familiar: a downtrodden orphan boy learns magic while adventuring in a universe populated by human armies, elves, trolls, witches, wizards, werewolves and sentient trees.  The narrative voice has an ease and contemporary simplicity that makes it accessible and appropriate for my kids... ie, it is not "The Lord of the Rings," or "Game of Thrones."  But Ms. Blackwood's series does have an unusual amount of moral complexity for a book written for younger readers.  Even the very sympathetic main protagonist has to take actions that make him quite uncomfortable and he struggles with the fact that his motivations aren't always noble.

And then there are the werewolves... They do generally fight on the side of the good guys. And Malthus is a multilingual, astute reader of ancient texts.  But in a pinch, the werewolves see the eating of humans pretty much as an entitlement.

My sons, of course, are mostly interested in the character of Jinx, the orphan who ends the series with powerful magic abilities.  My eight year old told me that he thinks Jinx's life is better than his own. As usual, I felt compelled to point out that Jinx starts the story abandoned by his step parents to a certain death in the forest. He shrugged. I persisted, "that means he doesn't have a mother and has to look after himself."  My son shrugged again, and remarked that by the end of the series, Jinx is 15 and can take care of himself anyway.

I am definitely looking forward to being the mother of an entirely self sufficient 15 year old.

Screaming Goldfish from "Jinx's Fire"

Our kids are rarely enthusiastic about reading a book that is not a graphic novel, much less one that does not have any illustrations at all.  The "Jinx" series by Sage Blackwood has been one of the rare exceptions. We had to start reading the third book immediately after it arrived in the mail earlier this week.

We haven't finished the book yet, but we did come across a scene where some wizards attack Jinx with flying, screaming goldfish.  This was a very appealing concept....although if it were entirely up to my sons, there would probably be flying, screaming goldfish armed with grenade launchers...

The kids were justifiably not so impressed with my goldfish drawing, however. I got a late start last night and had trouble enough just making them look like goldfish at all, much less weaponized goldfish.

This image seemed to be a missed opportunity... I may have to give some more thought to the concept.
(I noticed last night that there is a band named "The Screaming Goldfish." It seems to be a nondescript German cover band, and was definitely not helpful here.)

Ewok Pilot and Yoda Hanging Out

Yub Yub?

There's been a little resurgence of interest in things Star Wars recently at our house. The contents of the enormous container of action figures and space ships got strewn all over the hallway, and we reread some of Jeffrey Brown's "Jedi Academy" series.

One of Ansel's favorite aspects of the series is "Ewok Pilot" a comic-within-the-book penned by the main character. The Ewok Pilot creates humorous disorder and speaks in cute Ewokisms along the lines of the aforementioned "Yub Yub!" and the always popular "EE Chee wa maa!!"

While the two characters might be near the same height, I didn't think Yoda would be as  impressed as my sons are with Ewok Pilot


And....pathetically, I just have to point out how nicely the napkin pattern lined up with Yoda's face. It's rare that I am able to make it work out so well.
Sad that this passes as a visual design accomplishment for me, but so be it.

Scabby from Chickenhare Book 2

 "Scabby wants to live!"

The boys really like the Chickenhare books by Chris Grine, and particularly "Chickenhare Volume 2: Fire in the Hole"  The book includes this scene where Scabby the sea captain expresses his feelings after being told that he and his companions are going to be transported to hell by a devil. 

This proved to be way too weird for lunch,  however.

I cannot say that I was surprised.

Space Dinosaur

"Could CAPTAIN RAPTOR be lost FOREVER?!"

What could be better than Dinosaurs in space?  They are at least as enticing as mutant zombie ninja cowboys... or viking vampire sharks...or alien samurai dragons...or....

Last night, my older son reminded us of the excellence of the "Captain Raptor" books.  There are two books in the series by Kevin O'Malley and illustrated by Patrick O'Brien that combine the little boy favorites of large talking reptiles with astronauts, spaceships, weapons and pirates:
"Captain Raptor and the Space Pirates" and "Captain Raptor and the Moon Mystery."

My sons were never particularly Dinosaur obsessed, but they certainly appreciate a big reptile with a big gun. The books are written in a pulpy, somewhat arch style that is perfect both for fatigued bedtime book reading parents who enjoy the irony, and kids who embrace the hyperbole. Every time Captain Raptor encounters deadly aliens like the "OCTOCOLOSSUS," the narrator asks, "Could this be the end of CAPTAIN RAPTOR?!"

Or at least that is how I remember it.

We are completely buried under a deluge of kids books at our house.  This is completely my fault. My blameless husband makes things like wooden bookcases for a living, but cannot possibly keep up.  (Not that he is able to even try most of the time, because, you know, shoemakers' children have no shoes, and woodworkers' children's mothers have to buy cheap bookcases from Pottery Barn)

But the upshot is that despite a specific request and quite a bit of shelf excavation, I could not find the Captain Raptor books last night.  Today's napkin is somewhere at a mid point between my memories of Patrick O'Brien's very fine illustrations and the space suited dinosaur character in the more recent and also excellent "Midas Flesh" comic series.

Archer suggested that I should just buy a couple more copies of Mr. O'Malley and O'Brien's books.
Definitely not. We already run the risk of an appearance on "Hoarders" without intentionally acquiring more than one copy of anything.  And we will need space to shelve the "Midas Flesh" TPB after we finish it.